Army Humor
In 2008 Should Economy Be Spelled Econome? by Knight Pierce Hirst
Eighty percent of Americans are feeling financially stressed by the economy. This was one of the findings of the American Psychology Association survey conducted April-September 2008. Approximately half the 7,000 respondents worried most about providing for their families and the other half worried most about job security, but women worried more than men. This was attributed to women, as a group, being less financially secure. As to how the stress was felt, 47% had headaches, 35% had upset stomachs and 34% had muscle tension. Obviously, there’s more than one way to feel a financial pinch.
Millions of Americans have felt the pinch by having to default on mortgages and hundreds of thousands of families have been forced out of their homes. In order to salvage as much value as possible from foreclosed properties, banks hire “property conservation companies” like Safeguard Properties to seal the houses, change the locks and mow the lawns. The goal isn’t to fix properties. It’s to get them to a minimum standard that won’t lower their value. Because Safeguard Properties alone handles 250,000 foreclosed properties monthly nationwide, home is becoming where the heart – break is.
As the stock market has fallen, so have faces, breasts and bodies as people opt out of expensive cosmetic surgery. Of the 700 cosmetic surgeons who responded to an industry survey, 53% reported decreases in business up to 30%. The decrease in surgeries, however, has caused an increase in less expensive, less invasive options. Instead of paying $7,000 for a face-lift, people pay $1,000 for Botox and wrinkle fillers – but they’re waiting more than the recommended 3 to 4 months between treatments. For now people are more worried about credit lines than worry lines.
People trying to save money on clothes has resulted in a 6% – 15% increase in business for both Goodwill and the Salvation Army in 2008. For-profit thrift stores and resale shops have done even better. Two-thirds of the 200 respondents to an industry survey experienced average sales increases of 35%; and the CEO of Savers Inc, a for-profit thrift store chain, reported that 30% of their customers have incomes over $100,000. Unfortunately, the people having to buy used items are less likely to donate old ones. Because of concern about inventory shortage, the Salvation Army is planning an ad campaign for January 2009 – the first in its 128-year history – first aid for an ailing economy
KNIGHT PIERCE HIRST takes humorous looks at life.
Take a minute to make yourself smile at
http://knightwatch.typepad.com
Article Source: http://www.earticlesonline.com/Article/In-2008-Should-Economy-Be-Spelled-Econome-/422509
MILITARY HUMOR
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This Is the Army $4.08 Rated: NASynopsis: The splashy, star-studded This is the Army is based on the Irving Berlin Broadway musical of the same name, which in turn was a reworking of Berlin’s WW1 “barracks musical” Yip Yip Yaphank. In both instances, the cast was largely comprised of genuine servicemen, many of them either recently returned from fighting or on the verge of heading off to war. The Hollywood-imposed storyline concerns Jerry Jones (George Murphy), a member of the original 1918 Yip Yip Yaphank cast. His showbiz career curtailed by a leg injury, Jerry becomes a producer during the postwar era. When the US enters WW2, Jerry gathers together several other cast members from the 1918 Berlin musical to help him stage a new all-serviceman show, titled (what else?) This is the Army. The show-within-a-show framework is able to accommodate a romantic subplot, involving Jerry’s son Johnny (Ronald Reagan, later a political comrade-in-arms of George Murphy) and Eileen Dibble (Joan Leslie), the daughter of Yip Yip Yaphank alumnus Eddie Dibble (Charles Butterworth). Some of the best moments in This is the Army are from the Broadway production itself, though the lengthy Alfred Lunt-Lynn Fontanne imitation and incessant “gay” jokes may have been too smart for the room in 1943. Guest stars include boxer Joe Louis, Kate Smith (singing “God Bless America”, naturally) and Irving Berlin himself, who steals the show with his plaintive rendition of “Oh, How I Hate to Get Up in the Morning”. All profits for the stage and film version of This is the Army went to the Army Emergency Relief Fund, which also controlled the rights to the film. Long withheld from TV distribution, the film finally hit the small screen when it lapsed into Public Domain in the mid-1970s. Hal EricksonPRODUCTION AND TECHNICAL NOTES:Aspect Ratio: Pre-1954 Standard (1.33.1)Sound: Dolby Digital StereoFeatures: Interactive menus; Scene index; QuizLanguage: EnglishTime: 1 Hour 45 Minutes |
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